Photo: Carly Waddell/Instagram

Carly Waddell, Evan Bass

Carly Waddellis opening up about her first Christmas withoutEvan Bass.

On Friday, theBachelor in Paradisealum, 35, shared a candid post onInstagramin which she revealed that this year’s Christmas felt “incredibly abnormal” afterseparating from her husbandof three years.

Waddell posted a lengthy caption about her “new normal” this holiday alongside a picture of her cuddling her two kids,Charles “Charlie” Wolf, 1, andIsabella “Bella” Evelyn, 2, both of whom she shares with Bass, 38.

“Merry Christmas 🎄 Christmas Day isn’t what I had excepted[sic] this year. The three of us. The new normal. Which feels incredibly abnormal, and actually very sad,” Waddell wrote.

“A lot of you kind people have asked if I’m ok. And I want to say I am, but I’m not,” she shared. “I will be though.”

The mom of two explained that Friday was the first day her kids would be staying at Bass' house overnight. Bass is also a dad to three older sons from his previous marriage.

“They are feeling so loved,” she added. “Thank you for checking on me. Love all of you.”

Earlier this week, Waddell and Bass who met onBachelor in Paradisein 2016,announced their separationin a joint statement, PEOPLE revealed.

“We have made the difficult decision to separate,” the exes said. “We will always cherish our time together and continue to have the utmost respect for one another as we focus on what’s best for the future of our family. We greatly appreciate everyone’s love and support and kindly ask that you please respect our family’s privacy as we navigate through this.”

The split came as a shock to fans of the longtime couple, who seemed to defy the odds of traditionalBachelorromances, though they had been largely absent from each other’s social media accounts in recent weeks.

Evan Bass and Carly Waddell.Michael Tullberg/Getty Images

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When they first met on the beach while filmingParadise, Bass (who competed forJoJo Fletcher’s heart onThe Bachelorette) and Waddell (fromChris Soules' season ofThe Bachelor) appeared to be an unlikely duo.

Eventually, the pair fell hard and Bassproposed on the season 3 finaleof the show.

Waddell added, “It’s been a long journey for me inBachelorNation, but I would do it a thousand times again. Because the next part is going to be bliss.”

source: people.com