Chasten Buttigieg.Photo: Carina Teoh
Chasten Buttigiegis the first to admit that his new book,I Have Something to Tell You—For Young Adults, is coming out at an opportune, but unplanned, time. A new version of his bestselling 2020 memoir, it debuts as books geared toward LGBTQ+ youth are beingbannedin schools around America.
Those bans weren’t in the headlines when Buttigieg first sat down to re-write his memoir, which he describes as “the book I wish I could go back in time and hand to younger Chasten.”
“Many people are quicker to play politics than they are to find solutions,” Buttigieg acknowledges to PEOPLE. “I know that my life is under a microscope. I know that people play politics with my family.”
Chasten and Pete Buttigieg with their twins, Gus and Penelope.Drew Angerer/Getty
Buttigieg says he tries to remember that some of the discussion surrounding LGBTQ+ issues on social platforms like Twitter isn’t illustrative of what average Americans are actually thinking.
“Whatever’s happening on social media, people tend to believe that’s the public square,” Buttigieg says.
The former middle school teacher, who took a leave of absence to support his husband’s 2020 presidential campaign, offers up a schoolhouse analogy: “All of those people think they’re the only ones in the cafeteria, but they’re actually just one table in the cafeteria. If you zoom out, you realize most people don’t care about whatever they’re talking about at that table.”
While he’s no longer spending time in the cafeteria, Buttigieg had his own former students in mind when writing the new version of his book. In it, he expands on many of his own stories he thought could resonate with younger people — like those about “growing up in an environment where I did not know it was okay to be gay.”
Chasten (left) and Pete Buttigieg.Matt Rourke/AP/Shutterstock
After the release of his first book, which debuted amid the COVID-19 pandemic, Buttigieg was elated to be receive feedback from those who, like him, had long felt different.
Of course, an additional audience for the book will be parents and teachers, which is why Buttigieg included a section on “conversation starters for families and teachers” — topics that he hopes will spur a larger discussion and that he plans to delve into during an 18-stop book tour (which includes many of the states where book bans have taken effect).
“I understand what it’s like to be a teacher watching students struggle with not seeing themselves reflected in the books that they’re reading,” Buttigieg says.
Buttigieg also has a new understanding of what it means to parent young children, acknowledging that his thoughts on the book shifted with the birth of his kids, Joseph “Gus” August and Penelope Rose.
“One day, I will no longer be here and this book will exist and they’ll be able to say, ‘My dad wrote this book about his childhood.’ And that gets me really emotional,” he says. “What am I leaving behind as a legacy? What kind of world am I building for my kids?”
The kids are the focus for Buttigieg, who describes the “tightrope walk” of navigating life as a public figure and raising young children.
One challenge lies in the busy schedules he and his husband juggle. On his book tour, Buttigieg will visit a different city every day for two weeks. Meanwhile, his husband travels frequently for his role in Biden’s Cabinet.
But the couple makes an effort to connect often, even if that means a phone call on the way to or from daycare, or FaceTimes after the kids are asleep.
And when the two are together, there are the occasional date nights, though they look a lot different than when the couple first started dating in 2015, after meeting on the dating app Hinge.
“The older the kids get, the more date night has turned into takeout and Netflix,” Buttigieg admits. “Once you get them down and put up all the bath toys, you don’t really want to put a suit on and go to an event. But Pete is really good about putting his phone down and flipping that switch.”
The transportation secretary is also skilled at providing feedback, Buttigieg says, such as when he would show his husband passages of the book to look over before it was published.
“He can either be strategic or he can be bolstering. He asks, ‘What kind of feedback would you like?’ And he’s so good about sending encouraging messages,” Buttigieg says of Pete.
Pete and Chasten Buttigieg.Tom Brenner/Getty
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The partnership is one that’s grown amid monumental life changes for the couple, who now juggle being under the political microscope and raising small children — one of whom, Penelope, recently discovered how to get out of her own crib — “not the best thing at 3:00 in the morning,” Buttigieg laughs.
But it’s his new life as a dad, Buttigieg acknowledges, that makes the message of his new book all the more poignant.
“We’re training our replacements, as Pete always says. I know that this book can do some good. And I hope that it makes them proud.”
I Have Something to Tell You—For Young Adults: A Memoirwill be published Tuesday, May 16.
source: people.com
